Half Way Home
by Pulpgeek
Summary: Someone else is living Buffy's life and she just might be doing a better job of it.
1. Default Chapter

Title: Half Way Home

Author: Pulpgeek

E-mail: pulpgeek@hotmail.com

Rating: Say PG-14 same as the show

Disclaimer: The characters do not belong to me. They belong to Joss Whedon and some suits. If they belonged to me there would a whole not be all this Buffy torture going on.

Category: Not going to say but I tend to be a B/X fan so take from that what you will.

-Half-Way Home-

An hour tell closing and my higher brain functions have already taken the night off. The two giggling witches in the corner should have been enough of a clue but it was when I caught myself flirting with customers I knew the boy was headed for a breakdown. The aforementioned witches aside the Magic Box does not attract flirt-worthy types. Time for Xander to take drastic sanity restoring measures.

With no shoppers keeping me pinned behind the counter I ambled over to watch Willow and Tara pretend to study. Willow may still be something of a geek but no one finds calculus to be that entertaining.

"So, Tara, ready to give up your witch loving ways and run off to my castle in the sky? Or at least my apartment down the street?"

Tara blushed. Tara is always blushing. I'd probably stop teasing her is she wasn't so darn cute when she gets embarrassed. Her cheeks get all red and she makes these little noises. Willow had a big cheshire cat grin. It's all part of our cunning plan to flirt with Tara until she realizes she's gorgeous. Willow's determined to drag her out of that shell so I've been recruited to help. Not that I resisted much. 

"Come on beautiful' I said, falling to one knee "What can she offer that I can't, aside from intelligence, good looks and decent job prospects?"

That warranted a smile so I congratulated myself on a successful round of flirting.

"I'd love to Xander but I think your girlfriend would kill us. Alas, we can never be."

That brought me to my feet. "Willow! Tara made a comeback! She's one of us now."

Willow and I both hugged an increasingly red Tara. "One of us. One of us."

Tragically, from a humor perspective anyway, Willow just had to explain in detail.

"See, there is this old black and white movie and it has this dinner sequence where all the freaks welcome a new member and they all chant one of us, one of us' and well maybe that was a dumb reference and now I sound like an even bigger geek than usual" Willow looked up at me. "Go away Xander, your making me revert to my non-cool pre-witch self."

I couldn't help but laugh at Willows fake pout. Teasing would probably have continued but the door chime signaled the arrival of my other two other favorite girls.

"Dawnster" I called out as the teenager bounded her way towards me. "How fare the Summers women this fine evening?" Yep. I'm in rare form tonight. I was about to get an earful of the troubling and angst ridden life of a high-school student when her older sister and slayer of my heart interrupted. 

"I was hoping to get in an early patrol and get some quality sleep time. If I'm not bright-eyed and perky for tomorrow's exams this whole semester is going to be a wash. You guys mind keeping an eye on the munchkin for me?"

Dawn didn't even have time to protest the munchkin crack before I grabbed my coat. 

"Willow and Tara can close up and mind Dawn. I'll patrol with you."

"I don't know Xander, two witches in charge of a magic shop. That way lies all kinds of badness. Not to mention missing spell ingredients."

Her best innocent face firmly in place Willow shoved us out the door. "Go on, Dawn will be fine and we promise not to destroy more that half the store."

A normal patrol for us was a lot more than just looking for vampires to stake. We talk, flirt, and occasionally much junk food. Plus the whole vampire slaying part. Can't forget about that. Tonight though I was with the Slayer, not my girlfriend. A little hand holding but that was about it. Things have been that way a lot recently. Pressure. Lot's of it. With her mom dead she has to take care of Dawn. Earn a living. College. Save the world on occasion. With all this going on who wouldn't be distant and moody?

Tonight is looking to be worse than usual. We are heading towards a part of the cemetery she normally avoids. For understandable reasons. We took the long route, checked out all the recent graves but in the end we ended up right where I thought we would. At her mom's grave. 

It's well taken care of, fresh flowers and everything. She comes here a lot. Sometimes with Dawn or one of us, mostly by herself. Sometimes I wonder if she is ever going to truly recover. I've found her here more times than I care to think about. Just standing listlessly trying not to cry. She hates that, crying in public. Always has. I like to think I've seen more sides of her than anyone else and in the past six years I have only seen her cry twice.

Tonight made three. I held her lightly and did my best impression of a rock. Stable, quiet, dependable. That's me, rock boy. When she gets like this it is best to just shut up and let her deal.

"Why do you think she took me in? Of all the kids who needed homes why the hell did she adopt a stupid, angry bitch like me?" 

That hit me like a body blow. Self-loathing had been part of her make-up for so long. I thought we had dealt with it. Moved on. So I'm wrong. Again. What a shock.

"Faith." 

She doesn't say anything. Just keeps staring at her mother's grave as if she expects the grave marking to confirm her worst fears. That she wasn't the daughter her mother had wanted.

"Faith." Stronger this time. I turn her around, looking right into her beautiful tear-stained eyes. "Your mom was a very smart women. She saw how special you are, even when you didn't see it yourself. She loved you, never once did she do anything to show a single second of regret."

That earned me a hug. One with enough Slayer strength behind it to crush the breath out of me. I just pulled her closer and stroked her hair. That normally helped. 

"She'd be so proud of you Faith. Dawn, school, slaying, your handling more than any one person should and doing a damn good job of it to. Your taste in boyfriends isn't bad ether."

I didn't see her smile, not with her head buried in my chest but I could feel it. One of those rare, sweet smiles that light up her face. She is so beautiful like that, it kills me that happiness is so hard for her to come by.

"Enough of this young lady. You have a busy day tomorrow so it's home to bed for you."

"To bed? Why Mr. Harris, are you trying to take advantage of me?" Even in the moonlight the wicked look on her face sent shivers down my spine, among other body parts.

"Not with the Dawn monster loose. Can't shatter her tender young mind with our crazy antics." It had been far to long since we had been alone as a couple. Hectic schedules and a nosey little sister did not contribute to serious romance. 

Faith sighed in agreement. We settled on a kiss. A slayer-level kiss mind you. Faith kissage could kill a lesser mortal. I just lost feeling in my legs. One of the lesser known but still vital slayer powers. 

When people talk about great kisses they usually remember the taste, or how their lover smelled. Whenever I kiss Faith those parts of my brain are long gone. All I know is the smooth velvet of her lips and the burning heat that comes from them. That and that when the kiss ends I always ache like some part of me was ripped away.

..

After dropping Faith off at her house, with a rather chase goodnight kiss due to an underage viewer, I head back to my apartment. It was supposed to be for the two of us, but when her mom got sick Faith moved back home. It is far too big for just me but to get a new place would be like giving up on her coming back. That is never going to happen. Never.

That sounded melodramatic. Still, some of my best memories are in this place. It was the first apartment I had after leaving my parent's basement. The mornings I woke up with Faith snuggled up beside me were among the happiest days of my life. I want them back so bad I could cry. For now I'm just worn out. Work, school, patrol and what remains of my love life leave precious little time for sleep. Glorious, wonderful sleep.

I throw my jacket on the couch and head for the bedroom. Just crashing sounds like quite the plan right now. I am about to leap headlong into oblivion when my sleep starved excuse for a brain notices something out of place.

Waiter, there is a blonde in my bed.

A cute blonde. A naked cute blonde. Curled up like a child in the center of my bed, sleeping the rest of the just. Wow. Poetry. Bad sign. She is small, frail looking and quite a bit beyond cute now that I think about it. Gorgeous actually, tangles of golden hair form the perfect frame for an angel's face. Stop. Where the hell did that come from? I don't even like blondes. Brunettes, one particular slightly crazy brunette. 

Thinking of Faith drags me back to reality. This is the room where I would spend hours just watching her sleep. All the tension and anger drained from her, the gentle innocence she always hides out in the open. She is the one who should be sleeping here, notwhoever this is.

The girl springs to life before my hand even reaches her shoulder. 

"Xander?" She is wide awake, her eyes clear and sharp.

The familiarity in her voice drives away any response.

"Why am I naked?" The tone is accusing but her expression is the one Willow used to get when she thought I was trying to get one over on her. She is using a sheet to cover herself and the beginnings of a blush are spreading over her cheeks. My traitorous heart twists the knife just a little.

"Xander, stop ogling and say something."

"I am not ogling."

"You are so ogling my butt."

Banter flowing easily. Danger.

"One more time, where are my clothes and how did I end up in your bed?"

The confusion in her voice is real. Her body is not the only naked thing on display, raw emotion stands out on her lovely face. This is not a joke and she doesn't look crazy. In this town that leaves one major suspect. Your pal and mine, the Hellmouth.

"I'm sorry but I have no idea how you got here. What's the last thing you remember?"

"Glory. I was fighting her and there was this gate and Dawn was going to kill herself so I jumped and.how come I'm not dead. I should be six feet under but I'm alive and naked."

I maybe understood half of what she said, but I heard enough. Glory. I don't think I'll ever forget her. What she almost did. The way she beat Faith almost to death. Probably would have if Will hadn't used a spell to paralyze her. The blood on the ritual knife as it fell from my hands. Faith holding Dawn. We came so close to losing her.

The girl is crying now, confusion turning to despair. Almost as a reflex I reach out for her. Strong arms pull me in close. Far stronger then such a slight girl should be. Familiar strength.

Oh god. 

I pull back slightly so I can see her eyes.

"Who are you?"

The words might just has well have been a fist. 

"Xander? Pleaseyou know me." A pleading whisper.

"You're a Slayer."

Light returns to her eyes. "The Slayer. One girl in all the world bla bla great destiny yada yada kill the vampires ect. Buffy Summers, chosen one. That's me." 

Funny, she doesn't look like a Buffy, that's a name for one of Cordy's old crowd. A cheerleader. A prom queen. Some silly little thing. This girl is none of those. I can feel the strength in her. The courage. Like Faith. 

Buffy Summers.

Summers.

Crap.

This isn't happening. Even on a Hellmouth this isn't happening.

I think I need to call Willow. Now.


	2. part 2

Title: Half Way Home

Author: Pulpgeek

E-mail: pulpgeek@hotmail.com

Rating: Say PG-14 same as the show

Disclaimer: The characters do not belong to me. They belong to Joss Whedon and some suits. If they belonged to me there would a whole not be all this Buffy torture going on.

Category: Not going to say but I tend to be a B/X fan so take from that what you will.

Over the years I have developed two distinct reactions to disaster. If it's of the giant rampaging monster variety call Faith. When it's a crisis of the my life is falling apart, what the hell should I do now?' variety call Willow. A naked non-Faith Slayer in my bed constituted a defiantly Willow-ish emergency. 

Buffy was very much in favor of the call Willow' plan. Right after I executed the find her some damn clothes' plan. Her build was different but luckily some of Faiths lounging around gear fit her. She didn't even ask why I had girl's clothes laying around. The amount this girl seemed to know about my life was just creepy. 

With the whole nudity thing taken care of it was time to call in my favorite redhead.

It took six rings for Willow to pick up.

"What?" Her voice was awake but cranky. I must have interrupted some witchy loving.

"Willow, could you come over? Right now?"

"Xander? If large portions of the known world are not in immediate danger you are such a dead man." A frustrated witch is a dangerous thing.

"It is serious. This naked girl just showed up in my bed and she.."

"A naked girl in your bed? Faith is going to kill you."

"Willow this girl is not normal."

"Is she cute?"

"Well, yes." Understatement.

"Why don't you send her over to my place then?" Willow gave that last line her best bad-girl drawl. Some girls are just not cut out for the vamp' role.

"Leave the bad innuendo to the pros Will."

"Hay, that was pretty good innuendo. Tara liked it."

"Tara likes everything about you Will, she's a bit biased. Now can we get back to my problem?" Past mid-night, possible crisis and we're still joking. I love this girl.

"Right, naked girl. Not Faith. Your impending demise."

"Willow. She's a Slayer. That and she talks like she knows me. Us. Claims her name is Buffy Summers. I know it's late Will but this is a whole new level of weird."

"I be there in twenty." The line clicked and she was on her way. 

Buffy was sitting on the couch, apparently finding my floor to be terribly interesting. The wrong sized clothes completed her little girl lost look and could feel my heart go out to her. When she looked up at me and smiled I felt it do something else.

"Hi"

"Hey"

"You-you really don't know who I am do you?"

"I'm sorry Buffy, I don't know what is going on but I can't remember ever meeting you."

"Maybe it's some kind of spell. The memory erasing kind. There was this one time on Halloween where I forget I was me, this costume make me think I was some old-fashioned noble woman."

I remember that night. Like I'd ever forget what Faith looked like in that gown. Her mom's idea, she all but had to force Faith into it. My Slayer thought it made her look like a silly, screaming, useless bimbo'. 

"What about me?"

"What about you?"

"What did I turn into?"

"Some kind of commando guy. You were pretty cool that night Xander."

Right again. She knows me but I have no idea who she is. My head hurts.

"Buffy, how did I meet you?"

"It was my first day at Sunnydale High. I sort of ran into you and dropped one of my stakes. Then you heard Giles giving me the whole chosen one' speech. Some vamp had Willow, you came with me to save her and am I the worst storyteller in history or what?"

"I'll have you know that title is taken, you dare challenge my superior incompetence?"

That got a laugh. A small one, but it still counts. 

I bit back the question I wanted to ask. Needed to. She knew me, Willow, Giles, so what about Faith? If she's the Slayer what about the one I know?

Willow's early arrival saves me from brooding. Girl always did have good timing.

..

The look of total confusion on Willow is making me feel a lot better about myself. Nice to know I'm not the only one struck dumb by the oddness of this situation. For her part Buffy is beginning to look somewhat annoyed.

"Ok, whatever I did I'm sorry. I'm a bad, wicked Slayer undeserving of you two wonderful friends. Now could you please stop this? I passed scarred ten minutes ago and I'm approaching hysterical. Guys? Please?"

"Buffy" Willow was using her best Dr. Rosenberg' voice "I going to cast a spell that checks for traces of magic. That should tell us what is going on. Ok?"

"Like when I was trying to see if someone had cast a spell on mom but no you have no idea what I'm talking about do you so I'll just shut up and let you do your witchy stuff."

Willow tried to look all normal and everything but I could see the concern just dripping off her. We both knew exactly what Buffy was talking about. Neither of us had mentioned Faith so far and I'm not sure I want to see what happens when we do.

Always the prepared one Willow started digging magic supplies out of her bag. Candles, powders and various stones. I half suspect Will could cast most spells with just a wave of her hand. She just digs the whole ritual and chanting part. Must be the repressed science geek in her. That or she does it to impress Tara.

The ritual turned out to be fairly simple. Dimmed lights, few magic circles, a little tossing of shinny dust and Will invoking the power of some goddess I'd never heard of. Standard witch stuff. Must have worked though cause Buffy started glowing some odd orange color. 

"Ok, I think I get this. Buffy is the Slayer but she's not our Slayer."

"Translation please Will."

"Alternate universe. Like on Star Trek remember?"

Or the evil Faith that witch summoned to kill Giles our senior year. Catfighting twin Slayers in tight leather pants. Now there is a memory that has served me well these long years.

"So how did I get here?" Buffy seamed a lot calmer. An explanation, even one as weird as this, looked to help a lot.

"This is just a theory butfrom what you told us Buffy I think when you jumped into that gate you did die."

"Um, Will? I know I always say that Sunnydale is the tenth level of hell but I was just kidding. How can this be the afterlife?"

"It's not. I think someone used a spell to bring your spirit back but something went wrong and you landed up here instead."

"Bring me back? Giles always said that you couldn't do that with magic. You'd just get a zombie or something. If magic couldn't save my mom then how the hell could it bring me back from the dead!?"

"I don't know Buffy. That sort of thing is powerful magic and not the good kind either. Way beyond the kind of spells I use. Sorry, guess I'm not quite up to being the witch you need." Willow looked so sad I just wanted to hug her close. Buffy beat me to it, clutching Willow into a tight embrace.

"It's ok Will. You always come through for me. At least I know I'm not crazy. Just dead." 

As Willow pulled away I could see a calm spread over Buffy. Her lips hadn't even parted and I knew what was coming. This was not going to be good. 

"So, what exactly are you guys not telling me?" 

"Who, us?" Willow's voice went up three octaves. Sweet girl, bad liar.

"I can tell the two of you recognized just about every weird Hellmouth-related thing I've said. Plus you know about the Slayer. So if it's not me then who got stuck with the job? Keep in mind that if you say Harmony I will hurt someone."

"Her name's Faith and she's.." Willow didn't even come close to finishing.

"Faith! The fate of the world is the hands of that skanky little bitch? Ok, I know she's trying to reform and all but pardon me if I hold a grudge. I'm surprised any of you are still breathing. Why are you looking at me like that Xander? Did she seduce you in this universe as well?"

Actually, I thought I was doing a great job of not going ballistic. Listening to someone berate Faith without snapping back is twisting my insides into knots. Standing up for her has become almost a reflex action.

Willow has always been able to read me better than anyone. Well enough to know more info was needed before I imploded.

What was she like Buffy? The Faith you know?"

"Faith. Right. Faith. She showed up in Sunnydale my senior year. I thought it was great at first, two Slayers means I might actually have time for a life. She was, you know, cool. Every guy wanted her and she didn't give a damn about anything. I didn't get how far out of control she was. After Faith killed some guy she went over to working the dark side of the force. Screwed up everyone's lives, almost killed my boyfriend and ended up with a knife her gut. My knife. Ends up in a coma, comes out after a few months and steals my body. Screws my life again, sleeps with my new boyfriend and finally high tails it out of town. Last I heard she was rotting in jail. The end and good riddance."

Oh my god. Faith. I had to lean against the wall to keep from just collapsing. She would talk sometimes, wondering what would have happened to her if Ms. Summers hadn't taken her in. If she hadn't had people who loved her. The thought of her, alone and bitter is almost more than I can take. I want to rush out of here and find Faith. My Faith. Find her and hold her close. Tell her how much I love her, how much we all do.

"She's not like that Buffy.." Willow snapped out of it before I did. Go Will. You tell her.

"Ok, so I didn't like her very much at the beginning. What with the whole slut dress code and Xander drooling over her and me still kind of hung up on him back then. She did lots of good stuff though, even if she was mean and pushed people away Faith always did the right thing. After a while she stooped pushing so hard and we all began hanging out together. She's my friend Buffy, yes she is still kind of messed up and sometimes I do want to cast a nasty spell on her Xander-stealing butt. Only sometimes though. The rest of the time I love her like a sister. A crazy, violent, exhibitionist sister but still a sister."

"Will. You're babbling."

"Sorry." She lightly hit my arm "Your supposed to stop me when I do that."

Buffy was staring at the floor again, her expression haunted. Idly she played with the hem of the sweater she wore. "This isn't Anya's is it?"

Anya? "No, it's one of Faith's"

"How long have you been together?"

"We've been friends since she transferred here sophomore year. As a couple, I guess we got together just before the senior prom. Faith isn't the kind to just let you into her heart."

"Do you love her?"

"Since the first moment I lay eyes on her. Actually, that may have been lust but it didn't matter. I was hooked. I can't imagine my life without her. She is my one and only."

"Why?"

With every question Buffy's voice had been quieter and quieter. I have no idea why Buffy needed to hear about my love life or why I felt the need to tell her. She-I, just did.

"Faith is the most brave, compassionate person I've even met. No matter what happens or what she has to deal with she'll risk everything to protect others. Her heart I guess, that's what I fell for."

I couldn't say the rest. It just wouldn't come out right. About how gentle her smile could be. About how she'd protect the people she loved like a mother wolf. The way she tried to be both sister and mother for Dawn. The way she would hide her pain with a kick or a flirting joke. She was the woman I loved and that was it. No words necessary.

I don't know what Buffy expected to hear but she looked more distraught than before.

"You can't!"

"Buffy, you do.."

"No, I don't understand. You're not supposed to love her. She's not who, I mean how can you? Why her?"

"Buffy" Willow's voice was calm but insistent "what is Faith's last name?"

"I-I don't know."

"I'm not sure about where you come from Buffy but here her name is Summers.

Joyce adopted her when she was twelve. Dawn is her sister."

Buffy said nothing, just stared off into the distance, looking for all the world like her heart had been ripped out. I have no idea why the news hit her so hard but there was only one thing I could think of to do.

"Buffy, I think you and Faith need to talk."


	3. part 3

Title: Half Way Home

Author: Pulpgeek

E-mail: pulpgeek@hotmail.com

Rating: Say PG-14 same as the show

Disclaimer: The characters do not belong to me. They belong to Joss Whedon and some suits. If they belonged to me there would a whole not be all this Buffy torture going on.

Category: Not going to say but I tend to be a B/X fan so take from that what you will.

From a dramatic perspective I suppose it would have worked better if I had dragged Buffy over to Faith's right then and there. Waking a sleep deprived Slayer at two in the morning would not be much of a survival strategy though. We needed to talk, all of us, but this was the sort of conversation best held when all involved are fully conscious.

No matter how brain fried we all felt by recent events sleep was agreed upon as the most rational choice. Buffy took my bed while Willow, who looked determined to see this one through, claimed the couch. I got the floor, thank god for shag carpeting.

Morning was a weird ritual, all three of us preparing for the day while pretending nothing was wrong. Nope, no emotional land mines here folks. Just three crazy kids ready for another fun-filled day of college life. Will and I would go to our normal classes while Buffy hung around the library. No tension at all, please ignore the young man trying to chew his own arm off. You'll just encourage him.

Faith and I had our first class together. We have almost all our classes together and not just because we're dating. We've studied together since the beginning. Faith had this thing about proving she could be the good daughter. Top grades and everything. Willow tried to help at first but being Will us mere mortals tend to feel inadequate in her lofty presence. So I joined in figuring two academic rejects could support each other. In the beginning I just wanted an excuse to spend more time near her. For some reason though we clicked academically long before we clicked romantically. Through a series of late night cram sessions/ sugar feasts we made it to college. Together. That many a session ended up focusing on biology and anatomy didn't hurt my love of learning.

Back to back exams and by just past noon we're free for the day. Faith and I exchanged a few smiles but nothing else. I'll admit it, I'm procrastinating. If I can put off trying to explain the whole sorry mess to her long enough maybe I can pass the buck to Will.

Whatever god looks out for cowards and fools mush have been on duty cause Willow was waiting for us right outside the classroom. Without preamble she directed us towards the library. Faith knew better than to question Will while she's in serious-girl mode but that didn't stop her from throwing questioning glances my way. I avoid most of them. Demons and vampires I can handle but this has me spooked at a level I can't even begin to grasp.

Buffy is waiting for us on the library steps looking surprisingly together given she only had the contents of a bachelor pad to work with. Faith's reaction is, well, about what you'd expect.

"Who's the blonde and why the hell is she wearing my clothes?" 

"Faith, it is kind of complicated. We need to go somewhere private and talk."

"Fine. First tell me how come some little slut is wearing the sweater I left in your closet."

Did I mention the part about how possessive she is? Normally I find it cute.

"It involves Slayer-type weirdness, I'll explain everything as soon as we get in the car."

The temperature in my car must have dropped twenty degrees from the chill radiating out of those two. Faith was glaring ice daggers at Buffy who didn't look that thrilled at being near the other slayer ether. I watched Faith in the rearview mirror as Willow laid out what Buffy has told us and her spells had confirmed. It was devastating to watch the effect it had on Faith. From anger to confusion then despair. Every horrible thing she ever suspected about herself was now confirmed. 

Like hell it was.

I slammed on the breaks, pulling the car off to the side of the road. Adrenaline pumping I threw the door open all but pulling Faith out after me. I clutched her as tightly as I could, feeling the little tremors run through her body. She didn't feel like the Slayer, just a scarred young woman starring into an abyss she has always known was right beneath her feet.

"It's not you Faith. I don't care what she says, the person she is talking about is not you. Ok, you're screwed up. I'm screwed up. So are Willow, Tara, Giles and just about everyone else we know. We live on a Hellmouth for christ's sake, your contractually entitled to be screwed up. Just because there is some psycho running around with your name does not make you any less wonderful. Ok?"

I lifted her chin enough to see the faintest wisp of a smile. Her eyes were wet but she wouldn't cry. Not here, not where people could see.

"Remember the doppelganger that got sent after Giles senior year?"

"I remember you almost banged the little tramp."

"Well you weren't putting out. What was a guy to do?"

"Get a fatal disease? Who knew where that ho had been."

"Was she you"

"HELL NO!"

"Well then if your ever find Buffy's Faith you can give the name-stealing bitch the same beat down you gave the first one. There can be only one."

Something between a smile and a sigh.

"Xander, even when your trying to be Mr. Mature and Supportive you still can't resist a dumb movie quote can you?"

"No but that's part of my charm."

"You have charm?"

"I have loads of charm. Bushels of it. Acres. Whole warehouses full of it"

"Down cowboy, you'll bust a blood vessel. Lets get a move on, I feel the need for a long talk with blondie.

I dropped Willow off at the magic shop. She said something about Buffy and research but to be honest I wasn't paying that much attention. My mind, to put it mildly, was elsewhere.

We made it to the Summers home without further drama. Buffy and Faith headed upstairs and I ambled towards the kitchen, Not even a dimensionally displaced Slayer could stop the mighty Xander appetite. The fridge is mostly frozen food and take out. Faith tries to cook, part of the whole big sister/surrogate mom bit, but these days there is just no time. I nuke some White Castle sliders and head towards the living room to vegge while the deadly duo hash things out.

It's not like I was intending to eavesdrop. This is an old house and sound caries via the ventilation ducts. Pure coincidence that you could hear what was said in Faith's room from where I sat. Just dumb luck. That's my story and I sticking to it.

"Faith?"

"Yes o' blonde one?"

"Stop. I just wanted to apologize for dropping into your life like this. I don't think I could handle it as well if some girl came out of nowhere telling me about a darker ver"

"I don't want to hear about her Buffy so forget it. What I would like to hear about is you."

"W-what do you want to know"

"Xandar. You and him. Your Xander."

"I don't think I'd call him my Xander".

"Oh please Buffy. A couple of things may be very different but I've heard enough to get the picture of your world. Loser boy falls for hot Slayer babe and follows her like a lost puppy even though she treats him like dirt. Same as it was here."

"That's not how it is."

"Really? So Xander isn't in love with you?"

"He was. I think. The first two years I knew him. It was nice having a guy look at you like that. Reminded me of what it was like before the whole Slayer gig started. When I could walk down a hall and make every guy want me."

"So why'd you never give him a tumble?"

"It wasn't like that, Xander was my friend. Nothing else."

"Bullshit."

"Come again?"

"Men and women are not supposed to be just friends', that's not how it works. If you two never got nasty something was keeping you apart."

"By that logic Xander should have been jumping all over Willow."

"By the time Xan figured out Willow was a girl it was already over. He was hooked on me."

"Aren't you the modest one."

"When you're as hot a piece of ass as I am Buff there is no use trying to hide it."

"Tramp"

"Your just jealous of my prime booty."

"."

"Buffy?"

"Angel. The reason nothing ever happened with Xander was because I fell for this guy named Angel."

"For the love of God Buffy please tell me you not talking about the vamp I think you are."

"Is he evil here?"

"He's a decent enough guy but damn Buff, he's still a vampire."

"What can I say. Handsome, well dressed, broods a lot. He had the whole tragic soul thing going on. Tailor made for a high school girl to fall in love with."

"Ouch. So how long did this little disaster last."

"Three years and it wasn't a disaster. I loved him. I think I did anyway, at sixteen everything in my life was so dramatic."

"Can't have been much fun in the sack. No heartbeat, cold skin and grave breath."

"He was a good guy Faith, maybe we were destined to implode but lay off him ok?"

"I know. When I was first starting this whole Slayer biz he saved my hide a bunch of times. Hell, he's involved with a friend of mine. Cordy can handle his self-pitying whine but you Buff, you're the last sort of person he should be with."

"Ok, that warrants a hey!'.

"Big brooding types shouldn't date Buffy. Otherwise we are talking serious negativity meltdown potential."

"I do not brood. I am totally brood free in fact."

"You brood Buff. I brood, you brood, we brood. It's a Slayer thing."

"Faith"

"Bad memories? Ok, it's dropped."

"What about you Faith, how did things start with you and Xander?"

"Basically he took one look at me in a pair of tight jeans and it was all over."

"Cute. I mean how did heit's just that he doesn't seem to be your type."

"So what is my type Buffy? Big dump guys who just want a ride?"

"Faith I didn't mean that."

"Yes you did. Still, you want an answer I'll try and give you one. When I first met Xander I figured he was just after some tail. Why not, every other guy in school was. I pushed him away, he came back. I was a total bitch and he was still nice to me. Eventually I did something real stupid. Decided I was going to take on the Master all by my lonesome. When Xander and Willow tried to stop me I just ripped into them. I was the Slayer and I didn't need a pair of useless sidekicks. So I go in solo and the old bastard kills me. Despite all the crap I gave him Xander still came after me. Brought me back. I guess that's when I realized he wanted more from me than just a screw."

"Wow Faith, that's actually sort of touching. In a romance on the Hellmouth kind of way."

"I like to think of it as a very long first date."

"So you hooked up after then?"

"Ha. The boy wasn't getting into the gates of paradise that easy. We did become friends and I pretended not to notice how often he was checking out my rack. We kissed once after that whole Oni King mess but that was more of a yhea! We're not dead' kind of kiss than a romantic one. Senior year he invited me to the prom and things just kind of clicked."

"Clicked?"

"I'm taking the details to my grave Buff but let's just say that Xander cleans up real nice."

"That embarrassing?"

"No. Just private. If Xander tells you anything about how I was suddenly all feminine' or anything involving crying he's full of it. Ok?"

"Xander is a lying dirt bag. Got it."

"Watch it Buff, no one insults my boy-toy but me. So back to the subject you were avoiding. You and Xander, why not?"

"After Angel I got involved with someone else. Nice guy, human."

"Ended badly?"

"How?"

"Call it a hunch, we are a lot more alike then you'd care to admit Buffy. So, what about now. Seeing anyone?"

"Not unless you count being stalked by Spike as a relationship."

"William the Bloody Spike? What is it with you and vamps Buff?"

"Sadly true and I wish I knew. Don't tell me, you dusted him."

"Hell yes. With his crazy bitch as a side dish. Sunnydale only has room for one beautiful nutcase. Now stop changing the subject. You're not with anyone right now?"

"Not for awhile."

"Xander with anyone?"

"Anya. She's an ex-demon. Cute in a weird way."

"Ex-demon? He does like us bad girls doesn't he?"

"Actually Anya is rather nice. Strange, but nice."

"He still loves you though."

"Faith, don't."

"Well, he does doesn't he?"

"I think so. Ok, yes. He does. I can see him watching me sometimes. He thinks I don't know but every now and then I'll see him in a mirror while he's watching me. The look on his face is soI have no idea actually but it breaks my heart."

"So throw him to the floor and give him a taste of Slayer flavored goodness."

"I CAN'T! Damn Faith, get it through you skull than we are just friends. He is not the secret love of my life and I don't need to be rescued from the loneliness. I'm glad the two of you are happy but you're not me."

"."

"Ok Buff, I didn't want to have to go this way but whatever it takes I guess. You repeat one single word of what I'm about to say and I'll pull out every one of those bleached blonde hairs. Get comfy B. cause you're about to get Faith and Xander the ugly version."

"F.."

"Just shut up and listen will you? Ok?"

"Ok."

"The reason mom moved to Sunnydale is because I got expelled from school back in LA. The reason I got expelled is I put a guy in the hospital. The reason that happened is, well, I was a freshman trying to fit in like everyone else. That didn't work so I went back to dazzling the guys with my killer bod. Lots of them tired to touch but I pounded down anyone who pushed their luck. There was one guy, good looking, nice, sports hero. He didn't push, just said nice things. Told me I was beautiful. That kind of crap. I fell for it though, like a moron I slept with him. Next day I'm the school slut. He's laughing about it. Guys are congratulating him. So I made sure he will never walk or have sex, ever again. That got me thrown out."

"Part two. I come to Sunnydale and meet this guy. He's kind, treats me nice but I'm sure he is just after one thing. Even when I find out I was wrong the whole sex angle is not something I want to deal with. He never pushed though, he put up with all my crap and spent the better part of three years putting my broken soul back together. I only went to prom with him because it made mom happy. She thought he was good for me. It wasn't until the last damn dance that clarity finally got past all the scar tissue around my heart. He loved me. Not just the body. Me. Faith Summers. I spent most of that dance bawling like a baby. We made love for the first time that night and when he held me I feltinnocent."

"Wow."

"I pour my heart out to you and all I get is a wow'? You're a tough nut B."

"I-I'm sorry, that was sweet and I'm happy for the two of you but what does it have to do with Xander and me."

"It's a good thing you're cute Buff because you sure are thick. Look I was about as emotionally screwed up as you can get. I know all about pain and you my dear are full of it. Wait, that didn't come out right."

"I not full of anything."

"Sure, right, You're the Slayer, you are so tough you can handle anything. Wake up Buffy, you all but drip pain. There is a very bad meltdown on the horizon if you don't do so"

"I don't need to hear this"

"The hell you don't. If I have to tie you to this bed I will. You need to get this one thing through your pretty blonde head. Pain does not go away, your not going to wake up one morning and not hurt. You can't fill the hole no matter what you do. Sex, alcohol, drugs, none of them will help. You'll just feel worse in the end. If you don't find someone you can really trust, someone who can take some of that pain, shoulder part of your burden then you are history. Doomed. Screwed. Do you get it?"

"Faith, I get it but could you stop shaking me?"

"This isn't a joke Buffy. I'm talking about your life."  
"I know and thanks but you really think Xander is..,the one?"

"Maybe. He was for me, from the sound of it he is for you to. I could be wrong, wouldn't be the first time. Give it a shot Buffy, you don't have a hell of a lot to lose and he just might be what you're missing."

"Faith. Thanks."

"Your welcome. Should we hug now?"

"I don't think you're quite my type Faith."

"Ah, come on B. A little Slayer on Slayer action might be just what you need."

"Your terrible, you know that?"

"I'm a bad, bad girl Buffy. Didn't you know that?"

"No. You're a very good girl Faith. Even if you don't know it."

They kept talking but I stopped listening. I already felt like a heel for spying on such a personal conversation. Put it out of your head boy, if Faith wants you to know those things she'll tell you. For now I'm just going to do something productive that does not involve thinking overly much. Maybe Faith has some dishes than need doing. 

The ringing of the phone spared Faith's kitchen from the horror that is my housekeeping skills. Not that I was overly heartbroken about it mind you.

"Summers residence."

"Xander? Everyone holding it together over there?"

"Socking as it may be Will it looks like Faith and Buffy are getting along fine."

"Slayer bonding is a beautiful thing Xander. Oh, and I have good news. I think."

"Spill it my lovely witch."

"I dug up a spell that should get Buffy back home."

"That's great, so why the I think'?"

"Spells of resurrection are not good things Xander. Who knows what sort of place she'd be waking up into?"

"Think positive Will, maybe you and Tara figured something out."

"Nope. Not going to happen. That's blood magic, I'd never do stuff that black."

"Well, it's a chance anyway. Come on over, I'll run the situation by Buffy."

As I approached Faith's room the sounds escaping from under the door sounded suspiciously like giggling. Faith does not giggle. Maybe being blonde is contagious, or perhaps it's just that she finally found someone to open up with. Biting down a wave of jealousy I announced myself.

"Begging your pardons o bodacious ones but I bring news from our resident enchantress." Can I make an entrance or what?

Buffy and Faith both perked up. More so than usual, I did not just think that.

"Willow found a way to get me home?" There was more fire in Buffy's eyes than I had witnessed in the short time I'd know her.

"Apparently. She's on here way over now."

"Look, Buffy" Faith slid her arm around the other Slayers shoulder "Magic is a tricky thing. You don't know where you'll end up. If you want to stay here, you're more than welcome in my house."

"Faith" Buffy's eyes were already misting over.

"It's as much your place as it is mine in a way. I could always use help with the slayage and keeping Dawn in line. Not going to share Xander though, you'll have to get you own guy."

"I'd never try and take your man Faith."

They hugged each other and I had to turn away. Something in the eye. Not that I was going to cry or anything. Nothing like that. Wouldn't want to wreck my image.

"Thank you. I mean that with all my heart. I can't stay though. I have people who need me and I need them. There is a talk I have been putting off long enough. It's time to go for broke."

"You sure?"

"Um."

This was between them but there was a gnawing uncertainty I couldn't let go of.

"The spell that was cast to bring you back is bad mojo Buffy. That probably means that bad people cast it. You'll probably be waking up somewhere not so nice."

"I can handle not so nice. I'm the Slayer, it's what I do."

"But"

"Give it up Xan. Notice the determined chin? She's made up her mind and nothing is going to change it. We Slayers are stubborn bitches aren't we Buff?"

"Damn right."

I know when I'm beaten.

"I yield in the face of such mighty warrior women. Before we send Buffy off into realms unknown how about the gang grabs a decent dinner somewhere? We'll get stuffed and trade Slayer related horror stories."

"Sold. Except no sister of mine is going out in that outfit. Lose the rags Buff and I'll dig you out something to hug those curves. Might have to raid Dawn's closet but we'll find something."

I don't know if Buffy caught the sister' comment. Maybe it got lost in the ensuing laughter and dubious fashion advice. It stuck with me though. Damn it Faith. Every time I think I understand what you're about, you have to go and give me a new reason to love you.

.

It was much later that night when we finally got to the ritual. Buffy was wearing an old bathrobe and standing in a series of mystic circles Willow had chalked onto the floor.

The way Will explained it this spell would give Buffy a small push', just enough to help reach her original destination. We all felt nervous and it showed, except for Buffy. She seemed quite calm.

Tara got the last candle lit and Willow looked ready to go. She was beginning to get that slight jumpy bounce that she always got when trying out a new spell.

"It's going to be weird telling the gang about you guys. I think Xander will faint when he hears who he's dating."

"Um, Buffy?"

"Yea Will?"

"I don't know if you'll remember any of this. You must have been in the afterlife before the spell brought you here and well, since you don't remember that"

"No way. I can't just forget. Willow, you can fix it right?"

"Well- Iwait a sec."

Willow dragged Tara aside for a little witch on witch conference. It didn't take long. 

"Ok, this should do it. This stuff is sort of delayed action so if you do forget the spell will kick in a few months down the line."

"Months?"

"Sorry. Bad, bad witch. It's just that I don't normally use spells that affect the mind. Path to the dark side and all that."

"It's fine Will. Do me. No jokes Xander."

A few lines of chanting later Willow blew a handful of blue dust into Buffy's face. Once the coughing subsided Buffy favored Willow with a smile that could melt ice.

"You're always there for me Will. Thank you."

"Slayer assistance brigade, witch division is always ready to aid the cause."

One last round of good-bye's and the spell was cast. It turned out to be a fairly short and simple ritual. A bit of chanting and some glowing lights. One flash of color latter Buffy was gone. I missed her already.

Tara and Willow gathered their supplies and were gone with quick goodbye. That just left the two of us. Dawn was at a friend's house but I doubted this was exactly the time to try for romance. Faith has been leaning on my shoulder when she abruptly starting pulling me towards the stairs."

"Plan to turn in early?"

"Actually, I'm feeling the need to prove myself the superior Slayer. Want to come?"

"We're going to slay vampires in your bedroom?"

"I have better ways of proving my dominance."

"Ever the bad girl."

"Maybe you'll need to punish me afterwards."

"How about I race you to the bed?"

"Think you can take me boy?"

"Talk is cheep Slayer, on your mark?"

"Get set"

"Go."

I lost. It was close though so Faith decided on a consolation prize. As we held each other and laughed I thought of Buffy. I hope she finds what she needs. 

Faith pulled my face down to meet hers.

"What are you thinking of?"

"Nothing."

"Liar"

"Give me something to think about then."

She kissed me and the rest of the world just dissolved away.

-FIN-


End file.
